Now back to our regularly scheduled hotness….
Now back to our regularly scheduled hotness….
After the absolutely brutal and shitty week I’ve had, this is what I need:
I like making New Years resolutions. I do them every year and post them on the fridge as a reminder. I learned long ago that if you don’t write them down (and make them measurable) then they don’t happen.
So I have some additional resolutions that I made– but these don’t go on the fridge.
For one, I resolve to be less slutty in 2018.
(Yes this is measurable, but again not for posting here).
At the end of 2017 I was taking stock of my year and realized that I had a lot of sex. A LOT. And most of it wasn’t very fulfilling.
Too many flakes. Too much time wasted looking for sex. Too much Alex just for the sake of having sex. Too much “meh”. Too much meth*! Too little connection. And too much self esteem degradation.
* (meaning men who use meth or are in recovery here)
I didn’t like this assessment.
So I think I need to change this behavior in 2018.
(Along with this goes being less sexual– which will be hard. Pun not intended, but see??)
Also, I will be striving to not engage obstinate people on social media. The goal here is zero instances.
It just isn’t worth it. No hearts and minds change and it just leads to frustration and high blood pressure.
So fuck ’em. I’ll just ignore or unfollow. And continue to post my random weird apolitical shit.
I’m also going to try to be more social– to make events happen (like game nights and dinner parties) and to strive to say “yes” when invited to places or events.
Finally, I want to work on being nicer. This is definitely not a good measurable goal and a bit nebulous. But I can smile more. Hug more. Ask more questions of people to get to know them better. Listen more than talk. Learn peoples names.
We’ll see how all this goes, but now that it’s in writing, it’s more official.
Looking back at 2017, overall it was an okay year. No major highs or lows.
I’m still employed (although disgruntled a bit). I got a decent Xmas bonus. I’m Mostly healthy. I still love my condo. I got the FJ cruiser. Phoebe is ok. Gay chorus went fine. Book club has been good. I got to Palm Springs on a mini vacay.
So, all in all, not a terrible year.
But mom’s health has been declining (joint and mobility issues) and dad’s cancer returned. Although dad’s new chemo is working great and mom has good friends to help her out, so at least there’s that.
So what kind of year will 2018 be? It’s hard to predict, but I’m foreseeing a year of change already.
I’ll be continuing to deal with my parents health (more surgery for mom). We’ll be hiring by a new chorus director. Big changes are afoot at work (new quality system, new computer system). I may look for a new job at some point. And I may start playing trombone again.
And lord knows what will happen with our government.
I also made my New Years resolutions– part of them include making new friends and improving myself. So even more change.
If I can manage it all.
Hard to believe it’s already the first Wednesday of the new year. Stay warm!
So, the first week with my FJ Cruiser has been pretty good. The buyers remorse is wearing off and I’m getting used to the idea of having a different vehicle. Also, I’m finding myself actually excited to drive places. And I do really enjoy driving it.
Driving to and from Iowa was comfortable and easy. The ride is decently smooth (unlike he stiff suspension on the mini). And I enjoyed sitting up higher and the seats are decently supportive.
To give you an idea how much I like my new truck, I read the owners manual cover to cover on Christmas Eve.
We’ve also had some sloppy snow the past few days so I have kicked it into 4WD to test that out. It works great, btw.
I have noticed that the high center of gravity and fwd does make it less surefooted than the AWD minis. So that is taking a little getting used to.
Also- I had to replace the wipers on it. I know, right? What?? Well, evidently the dealer didn’t see fit to do that, which kind of bums me out. But it gave me good practice at doing it.
(PS– did I mention that the front windshield has 3 wiper blades? So quirky! So fun!)
It’s been a weird week. Enjoy.
Well… I did it. Something completely unnecessary. Something frivolous. Something that I’ve been wanting to do for quite some time.
I got a Toyota FJ Cruiser.
Yes I know. I’m ridiculous. And probably an idiot.
But I don’t care.
I have a thing for quirky vehicles (I.e. MINI) and have wanted an FJ Cruiser ever since they were introduced in 2007. Kind of retro styled– a nod to the original FJ40’s- and definitely distinctive on the road. Especially with the two tone paint.
Mine doesn’t have the two tone color scheme– he’s just white and black.
It’s big. It’s kind of hulking. It doesn’t get great gas mileage. It screams “micropenis”. And I still don’t care.
The luster had worn off MINI’s awhile ago for me. I was never very happy with my current one, and then having the transmission go out on me just soured me even further. So I’d been looking for a new vehicle for months.
I just couldn’t find any car that struck my fancy. I really don’t like anything that’s out right now. Well- except for high end cars which I can’t afford.
Which brings me back to the FJ.
I found myself looping back to the idea of a bigger vehicle. Something patently “not mini”. Something that was really different for me.
And I kept finding myself on used car websites looking at the FJ’s.
FJ’s are a bit hard to come by. Their owners tend to keep them for 100-200k miles. And beyond. So there aren’t many to come by. And they don’t make them anymore, which adds another wrinkle.
All of which got me thinking “If not now… when?” If I didn’t take a chance on one now, I probably never would. I’m not getting younger and the vehicles will just be harder and harder to get.
So I did it.
And I think I love it.
Naturally I have some buyers remorse. But only because I have this need for approval from others and I worry that everyone will be thinking me stupid and frivolous. But I did get extended warranty, and the vehicles are pretty reliable.
Things I love– the utilitarian nature of it. No nav system, no super fancy electronic dash, etc. It’s spartan and easy to use, and the interior is basically rubberized for easy cleanup.
It has cargo space. The rear seats basically fold flat. It has 4WD. It has a roof rack. It can tow 5000lbs.
And I think it looks pretty fucking bad ass.
Will I regret the lower gas mileage? Yes. Will I regret not having AWD? Maybe. But for now I’m going to enjoy it.
Better late than never!
Go see this movie. Go.
It’s really a beautiful film– shot in this sort of sleepy, quiet way that mimics the emotionally closed off Finish people. And it’s interesting. And melancholy. And fascinating.
What a crazy time to exist as a gay man in Europe– WWII and then progressing all the way to the AIDS crisis in the 80’s and 90’s. So many hurdles. So much oppression.
And such an interesting, yet sad, life Touko led. Covert hookups. Falling in love. Societal oppression. Familiar disapproval. And through it all his “secret pornographic art”.
Although I wish the film would have delved a bit more into how he first became interested in art and drawing, it does cover the main influences in his Tom of Finland style and how it gained a foothold in pop culture.
And how he became a voice for gay men.
I’ve always been a fan of Touko’s, and I read a biography on him a long time ago. I think the movie did a good job visualizing his life and struggles. And if you’re worried the movie might be graphic– it isn’t. No real nudity or sex– it’s mostly the allure of uniforms and masculine looks.
If it comes to your city, go see it. It’s worth it.