Easy peasy poojuice squeezie

The colonoscopy is complete. Results are back. All looks good.

As this was my first time, I overestimated the prep difficulty. It really wasn’t *that* bad. I mean, if you’ve ever had food poisoning or prepped to take a 10″ cock, it isn’t that much different. It’s somewhere between the two.

The magnesium citrate was kinda gross, but manageable.

The worst part was the clear liquid diet with no coffee. Now THAT sucked. I had a headache from not eating and I was cranky from lack of caffeine. The Donger need FOOD!

As for the actual procedure? Cake. They put you into Michael Jackson twilight sleep so you are fucking out. I was laying on my side in the scope room, chatting with the doc and nurses one minute and then I was opening my eyes in recovery.

And I literally popped awake. Like zero grogginess. I was just up and atom, no issues.

The doc came in and told me everything went very well. He did remove two very tiny anomalies (1.5mm in size) and these were actually found to be granulated lymph something or others– very normal and not pre-cancerous. So everything is ok (no masses, no other issues detected). So technically I’m good for 10 years, but we’ll see.

Because my doctor was handsome (added unexpected bonus) I did say “Now doc, normally a guy has to buy me a beer first before getting back there….”. He laughed.

Everyone also told me that I’d probably go home and sleep all day. Nope. I was wide awake when I got home. I ate. Had some coffee. Watched 4 hours of ST:TNG. Took a 1 hour nap. Then went and worked out.

As for gas and bloating? Non-existent. I’ve honestly felt worse discomfort after eating Indian Buffet.

So- all in all a painless experience. And if it can minimize the risk of colorectal cancer, then I’m all for it.

About cb

Nickname: Munt Measurements: 45 B, 34, 38(?) Ambition: to be the best human ever! Turn ons: long walks on the beach, romantic dinners, porn, rainbows, cock Turn offs: bad smell face, men who are full of themselves, dead puppies, popcorn, sadness
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1 Response to Easy peasy poojuice squeezie

  1. Infinite Jester says:

    Ah, the joys of propofol! I had my first colonoscopy before age 50 (still not there yet, for that matter) due to some issues I described to the NP who did my intake visit for what I was expecting to be just another EGD (my chronic acid reflux was suddenly not responding to my usual med). She asked me if I would be willing to have a colonoscopy as well. I responded sure, but I doubted my insurance would cover it since I was well over a decade from 50 (and no hx of colon cancer in my family, altho several polyps on both sides).

    To my surprise, they did approve it. Every GI endoscopist has their own preferred prep (I used to work in that field). I like mag citrate because of the reduced amount of volume you have to drink. Sometimes a doc may also want you to take some OTC dulcolax tabs for an added laxative boost. Other docs have you drink a shit ton (no pun intended) of other liquid preps. The liquid volume can be an issue for older adults (especially frail women who normally eat, drink, and weigh as much as a canary), but the electrolyte balance change is supposed to be less of a challenge to the CV system.

    Next time you might ask if it’s okay for you to take Vivarin (or similar caffeine pills) to help with the caffeine withdrawal. That was likely the source of your headache. You must like cream in your coffee. Always follow your provided prep, of course, but clear liquid diets usually include coffee minus dairy products (here’s an example prep).

    Anyway, it was my first personal experience receiving propofol. I was immediately a fan. I’ve had so many EGD’s that at this point I don’t bother with the older “conscious sedation/twilight sleep” protocols (e.g., Versed and Ketamine (Special K! LOL)). Other than my first 2, I could never tell any difference, and that way a driver wasn’t required and I could go to work. Just give me the topical numbing gargle and let me close my eyes and think of England, thankyouverymuch. Probably helped that I am used to taking something large down my throat LOL.

    But man, I could see why ol’ MJ was a fan of “the milk”! It was just as you described. And they actually found a polyp! It was non-cancerous, but who knows what it might have got up to left to its own devices for over a decade. My “issues” turned out to be from a fissure, which surprised me because I’d always heard those were incredibly painful and Sky Santa knows I was used to only feeling pleasure “back there”. 😉

    If in the future you happen to be on an opiod when it’s time for your next colonoscopy (whether short-term after say some unpleasant dental work or long-term for pain issues), be sure to emphasize that when scheduling. Since opiods slow peristalsis, the usual prep doesn’t always leave a patient “clear” enough for a good ‘scope. Usually an extra day of clear diet is added, although depending on the patient’s bowel habits sometimes other prep laxatives are used or added.

    Communication is key. It’s rather inconvenient and frustrating to go thru the hassle of a prep and arranging a ride, only to wake up, be told that the doc was unable to properly visualize everything, you’re going to have to do this again either ASAP or at best sooner than usual, and then get accused of not following the prep. I’ve seen it happen. I always felt the fault was with the intake, which should have probed for that, but docs can be assholes (again, no puns intended).

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