Back in Iowa


After a brief visit to the twin cities last week, I am back here in Iowa with my father. My return appears to be good timing, as he has taken a pretty severe turn in the past 24 hours.

This whole process has been much more difficult than I was anticipating. It’s sad and frustrating and both physically and mentally exhausting. And hospice has not been as present as I thought they would be.

I feel guilty for wishing it would just end. I think I’m at my threshold of what I can bear, and it pains me to see him like this.

I’ve never felt more alone.

About cb

Nickname: Munt Measurements: 45 B, 34, 38(?) Ambition: to be the best human ever! Turn ons: long walks on the beach, romantic dinners, porn, rainbows, cock Turn offs: bad smell face, men who are full of themselves, dead puppies, popcorn, sadness
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6 Responses to Back in Iowa

  1. truthspew says:

    My sincere condolences on your fathers suffering and yours. I know how hard it can be.

  2. Mark says:

    hospice is a gift…. they volunteer their time and their hearts… They were exceptional with both of my parents and are truly appreciated. They are forever short handed…..This is a difficult time and those of us in the virtual word can only offer good thoughts and love….. but dont condone those that are giving their time to help you. Look apon those that reach out to you to offer a hand with favor…. it comes from their heart…. this is where you learn to become humble…. sometimes a slap in the face but a life lesson…. been there…..

  3. Chip says:

    been there too…sending hugs, love, and virtual support your way. If things have taken a turn talk to the hospice folks. They turned up the “heat” for me when my dad was nearing the end rather suddenly.

  4. Chip says:

    Rough times. I hope Hospice has stepped up to the plate. My thoughts are with you during this difficult time

  5. John says:

    I was sorry to learn of your father’s death. I hope your memories of better times help erase your loneliness. Another musical guy, Andrew Rannells, tells an anecdote about his father’s death that might get a smile: The family is looking at caskets when his sister Natalie says to the funeral director: “It would really be helpful if we could see him IN some of these before we make our choice.” I miss my dad but rainbows follow rain, happiness does return. Hugs.

  6. Mark in DE says:

    It is completely normal to wish the end would come, to stop your father’s pain and yours. Its OK to feel that way.

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