Erick Update 2.0

Yeah, not much to report other than we’re pretty much in the death throes. Which pretty much sucks.

The non-stop daily texting and frequent face-timing has significantly tapered off– to almost non-existent. He used to text me daily when he woke up (to which I quite looked forward). Sometimes he would include an oh-so-cute sleepy pic.

Now sometimes days pass with no text at all.

Erick keeps pulling back “to process everything” during which time he basically goes radio silent. He’s done this a few times now, which leaves me wondering “should I text him just to salve my heart and ego or should I respect his need for solitude?”

I know he has a lot on his plate. He is contemplating finding a different job, rents are skyrocketing so money is an issue, he is trying to go back to school, he’s helping multiple friends in various states of drama, and he is looking for love and stability. So not a lot of time left over for a long-distance poor bet such as myself.

He has a full life there and loves living in San Francisco. I have an equally full life here in Minneapolis and have put down roots. And neither of our situations are going to change anytime soon.

But then we do talk or text and I really enjoy it and I think how nice it would be to curl up on my couch and watch a movie together (there are SO many he needs to see so that he gets my random references).

It’s all very confusing and it makes my heart hurt a bit.

And I know it’s just a matter of time now, before the texting and face-timing stops altogether. I suppose it was a nice idea while it lasted.

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About cb

Nickname: Munt Measurements: 45 B, 34, 38(?) Ambition: to be the best human ever! Turn ons: long walks on the beach, romantic dinners, porn, rainbows, cock Turn offs: bad smell face, men who are full of themselves, dead puppies, popcorn, sadness
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7 Responses to Erick Update 2.0

  1. Chip says:

    I’m sorry, CB.

  2. Symon says:

    So, plan a long weekend and fly out there. That way it stimulates the back and forth and builds a level of anticipation.

  3. 😦
    you deserve a caring friend.

  4. Mark in DE says:

    It makes it even harder when both of you love where you live, since neither of you wishes to relocate. Perhaps talking/texting will turn into something you don’t count on happening with any regularity, but eagerly welcome and enjoy when it does happen. Not what you were hoping for, I know, but perhaps better than giving up completely.

  5. jason says:

    First things first… you have to stop seeing yourself as a poor bet. You’re not. Cue Stuart Smalley here. Clearly he sees something amazing in you, and you in him.

    You’re going through some of the exact same things I went through. It’s pretty textbook for one person to pull away to avoid the hurt. The other person then thinks they should pull away, too, because maybe the other person isn’t interested. It sucks royally, but I urge you to stick it out. Don’t just back off because he’s backing off. There’s something there, fight for it.

    Part of what made my long-time (and once long-term) relationship so hard is that that neither of us wanted to move at first. It’s still too early to worry about such a thing (so don’t… cross that bridge when and if it comes). I will say that after more than a year, I eventually realized that what I was leaving behind was less important than the relationship that could (and did) blossom.

    I agree with Symon… a three to four day visit would do you good… try to do it sooner rather than later. You may need to take the first step and offer it as a gift. Plan to stay in a hotel to take some pressure off. In-person time takes a lot of the pressure off and will give you more insight into your future. It’s obvious from what you’re writing that you have something that’s worth all of the trouble. Good luck figuring it out.

  6. Martin says:

    CB, Everyone is being so positive so here’s my take (and what happened to me). I met and fell in love with someone in my NYC home. After a year he couldn’t take the city anymore and wanted to
    go home to Florida. He talked me into going with him. He really was special. It lasted 2 more years and then it was over. (Statistics show that most serious gay relationships last approximately 3 years, so I got my moneys’ worth!) . However, I was left in a place I never would have chosen but
    with a career I loved. So I stayed. Was it worth it? A question I ask myself every now and then.
    Just the other side of the coin, CB. Best of luck, martin

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