Just For Men

Okay. So I’m at the gym yesterday and I saw not one, not two, but THREE “men of a certain age” working out with horribly unnatural hair color.

Shockingly so.

The first guy had to be in his 60’s yet he had a head of ginger-brown waves styled into a coif that would make Rue McClanahan jealous.

The second was a guy in his (I’m guessing) later 40’s with a jet black shock of hair that was very reminiscent of gor-DON in the Framily commercials.

The third was an older, bald guy with a uniform, “kiwi shoe polish” beard.

Dudes. Come on.

Unless you’re a teenager making a statement, I believe that no man should color his hair. Ever. Mostly because it’s glaringly obvious when they do. And if anything, it detracts from their appearance.

Oh sure, there could be “exceptions”. Like if a guy is going prematurely grey and needs the vanity boost by covering a few errant strands– ok. Sure. Knock yourself out.

But if you are over 30% grey? Give it up already.

And don’t get me started on coloring facial hair. It neverlooks natural. Plus it takes a crapload of maintenance.

This got me thinking– what other unwritten “rules” are there for men of a certain age? I can think of a few:

– no wearing of AF, Hollister, or other teeny bopper labels
– no skinny hipster jeans
– no facial piercings
– no using the words Boi or Kewl

I’m sure I’m missing several– what are your suggestions for the list?

About cb

Nickname: Munt Measurements: 45 B, 34, 38(?) Ambition: to be the best human ever! Turn ons: long walks on the beach, romantic dinners, porn, rainbows, cock Turn offs: bad smell face, men who are full of themselves, dead puppies, popcorn, sadness
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24 Responses to Just For Men

  1. no speedos, sandals and socks, unkempt hair/beards/body fur.

  2. Mark, née Fuzz says:

    I would have to amend that to no speedos AT ANY AGE unless you have the body to pull it off. The same goes for spandex. In all fairness, though, I have seen men of an age who can pull off both better than 20 year olds. It’s not unique to men either.

  3. Chip says:

    I believe that body hair should be left in its natural state.

  4. Tate says:

    Agree on all counts! My ex (still a friend) dyes his hair and beard – it makes me ill to see it. Looks so fake and child molester-ly.
    Another thing are balding men who grow their hair long or comb over – Just shave the shit, looks much better.
    I believe:
    No Abercrombie after 29
    No bike pants for fatties –
    Speedos only belong on the hottest 1%
    Gay clubs after 40 – just seems sad.
    instagram selfies: no more than one a week – How many people post multiple duck-faced selfies daily! Enough!! Or they post 100 selfies all with the exact same expression!!

  5. Blobby says:

    No ‘Just for Men’…..but what will brettcajun do??? you forgot ponytails. no man over the age of 24 should have one.

    • cb says:

      As fate would have it, there is an older, balding man at my gym that not only dyes it jet black and tries to comb it over– he also pulls it back into a wee ponytail.

      I haven’t seen him recently tho

  6. Jon (friend of Blobbysblog) says:

    Gay guys who “boo hoo” about being single when it’s obvious they are b/c they’re so fucking shallow.

    • cb says:

      Oh! And anonymous faggots who troll and leave douchey comments!

      P.S. Sorry about your dye job.

      • Jon (friend of Blobbysblog) says:

        Not anonymous….you can see my info. Also thought it interesting that you automatically assumed my comments were directed just to you… and not to other people who posted.

    • Mark, née Fuzz says:

      Every one is entitled to their opinion. Here’s a classic example of one that should be written on a sheet of paper, wadded up in a ball, and shoved in the holder’s ass rather than expressed.

    • cb says:

      Well- anonymous in that you don’t have a pic showing your dyed hair– and no blog.

      And since your comment was on my blog post, yeah I figured you were being an asshole to me.

      But I guess you’re just an asshole to everyone.

      • Jon says:

        And you don’t think you’re being an asshole with your judgy mcjudgerson comments? I’m not going to continue to incite, but I do hope you step back and realize people can turn the tables on you. Doesn’t feel so good, does it? And I don’t dye my hair. Ask Blobby.

    • cb says:

      Oh, I don’t are that you’re such an asshole. But, my blog- my rules. I can be judgy. You don’t like it, don’t read.

      But you chose to be a dick.

      Personally, I would have thought Blobby would have better taste…..

      • Jon (friend of Blobbysblog) says:

        Brilliant “America: Love It or Leave It” attitude. Apparently, my calculated choice to be a dick worked…maybe just a wee bit. People in glass houses and all that….

  7. Ron says:

    I second the “no Hollister or American Eagle” after a certain age. It’s just as pathetic as the moms who try to dress/look like their teenage daughters.

  8. Chen says:

    Age appropriate clothing and styling is sexy. When I see someone who is reaching (desperately) to look youthful it makes me a little sad. It is far sexier for a man/woman to own their age and make it work for them – it is the confidence that just exudes sex. A pot-bellied older man in a Hollister shirt and board shorts should be a crime! Don’t get me started on horrible dye jobs. If you are a premie gray it is okay to dye until early 30s then embrace the gray. I hate seeing men/women in their late 40s and beyond with haggard faces and jet black hair – its creepy! Also, the dye jobs are cheap and flat with no highlights or lowlights so it looks tacky.

  9. Chip says:

    This is really funny, I just remembered when I lived in Richmond Virginia the woman who cut my hair used to “dye” it occasionally with Henna. Her purpose was not to get rid of the gray, but to make my hair thicker. As I recall the gray was only slightly minimized, but my hair looked great!

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