Toronto.

So, I’m currently sat at a Tim Horton’s, having a breakfast sandwich, donut, and coffee, and I’m musing on being in Toronto.

I really am here, honest. It’s for work. Well sort of work. It’s a technical conference for a materials society to which I belong. For work.

The view out my hotel room last night:

20140506-095524.jpg

See?

Anyway, so I’m here in Toronto and this morning I was overcome with this odd feeling. It feels like woke up in some city in the US, only everything was secretly replaced with almost-but-not-quite-right facsimiles.

I mean, everything just feels so… Bizarro.

Yeah. That’s it. It’s like I’m in Bizarro Chicago. Where everything still sounds and feels American, but where the city goes to sleep at 10 pm. And all all the stores look like ones in the US– only different.

It’s very unsettling.

Like “Tim Hortons”, for example. It’s like a Dunkin Donuts, only in a more subdued color palette. And with shitty coffee.

If the aliens “mostly” wiped my memory and tried to convince me everything was a-ok American, the shitty coffee would have tipped me off that things were phony and I’d be in a laser fight about now.

Tonight after my conference, I think I’m meeting a blogger/twitter bud. I’ll have some serious questions for him about all this.

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About cb

Nickname: Munt Measurements: 45 B, 34, 38(?) Ambition: to be the best human ever! Turn ons: long walks on the beach, romantic dinners, porn, rainbows, cock Turn offs: bad smell face, men who are full of themselves, dead puppies, popcorn, sadness
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3 Responses to Toronto.

  1. in my city and calling our coffee shitty! bold move my friend. oh and if you’re done by 10pm you aren’t looking hard enough. 😀

  2. Doréus says:

    A lot of Canadians feel very passionately about the extremely crappy coffee that they serve at Timmy’s… I agree with you, but at the same time, be careful to whom you say that. Apart from that, do enjoy the city. Or what’s to be enjoyed around there. And yes, there is action… in some places.

  3. are you meeting buddybear? or laurent? can’t wait to find out!

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