Funeral: part 2

Wow.

Y’all are (for the most part) much more caring and considerate people than I am. All this talk about going to the funeral to give my condolences to the family, that funerals are for the living, etc. Not to mention the chance to network and rub elbows with other management.

Clearly, y’all have much more experiences with funerals and find them to be of great significance and importance. All of which is pretty much what I figured.

Here are some additional tidbits though:

I don’t really know and have not met most of the family either. Not the spouses, kids, grandkids, etc. And the few family members with whom I have the pleasure of working are gun-toting, uber right wing, Christian, Palin-Bachmann supporting, homophobic, sexist bigots.

This goes for about 90% of the rest of the management team too, as they’re just as homophobic, sexist and bigoted.

And as much as it might be nice for me to express my condolences or network and be a company man, the thing is… I don’t want to. I have a hard enough time putting in a day’s work with these people, let alone spend time with them at something like a funeral.

There will be plenty of people paying their respects and plenty of management there all putting in “face time” to look good.

I am not planning to be one of them.

And yeah, this makes me a heartless asshole. Or a fool for not being a team player. Or probably both.

I’m not sure how I feel about this. I think I’m bothered that I don’t care more.

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About cb

Nickname: Munt Measurements: 45 B, 34, 38(?) Ambition: to be the best human ever! Turn ons: long walks on the beach, romantic dinners, porn, rainbows, cock Turn offs: bad smell face, men who are full of themselves, dead puppies, popcorn, sadness
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9 Responses to Funeral: part 2

  1. Tony says:

    We don’t get to go through life doing only what we want to. If we did, the things we want would hold no value.

    • cb says:

      You do when you have choices. Why would you choose to do something you don’t want to do??

      You only get one shot on this planet– why waste your precious time doing things you don’t have to do?

  2. Tony says:

    Apparently you only read my first sentence.

  3. You’re not a heartless asshole.

    While it’s true that funerals are in fact for the living, they’re for the living whose lives are impacted by the death. Frankly, the last thing I want to deal with at MY father’s funeral is some random dude from the place where he kinda-sorta worked shaking my hand and pretending to be sympathetic.

    If you really don’t want to be there, the family really doesn’t WANT you to be there.

    Don’t go.

    (Personally, I find the thought of a funeral as a “networking opportunity” to be quite repulsive.)

  4. Mark, née Fuzz says:

    Yes, funerals are for the living, but it appears my caveat wasn’t clear. You didn’t know him. You barely know the family. Condolences should you pass one of them in the hallway would be enough. There’s no reason for sitting shiva, wailing, or sin eating with strangers for a stranger. And I agree with D&O. Networking at a funeral would be tacky, barely a notch above cruising the mourners.

  5. Girl Tuesday says:

    I don’t know….cruising the mourners may have some merit…….. kidding!
    Going would show others that you are a kind person, and it really won’t be as bad as you think. Going even though you didn’t really know him is just a sign of respect. If I were a family member, I would appreciate it, even if I didn’t know you. I know you don’t want to go, but you might be surprised.

  6. Jeff says:

    Funerals for work don’t follow the same rules for personal acquaintances. I’ve worked in upper management most of my career and for work I have one simple rule. If I would be expected to attend their retirement party, then I’m expected to put in an appearance at their funeral – ONLY at the funeral home. Go when there are no “religious” activities planned, usually early in the visitation schedule.

  7. Kevin says:

    I wouldn’t go to the funeral. If I ran into a family member at the office within a few weeks of the funeral I’d offer my condolences but that’s about it. He was your employer, essentially a total stranger to you, and you to them.

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