49 States that is.
So, ever since the election there had been a lot of hullabaloo about Texas wanting to secede.
I say let ’em.
Texas is basically “North Mexico”, only controlled by bigoted assholes. Other than oil, the state’s biggest exports are cheerleaders, stupid presidents, and backward textbooks.
Seriously, other than Austin, the state is pretty much a waste.
Tex-ass is also a huge drain on our tax dollars. They suck up tons of federal funding, which is basically the height of irony, don’t you think?
However, the powers that be say the Lone Scar State is rich enough, what with their oil and all, to be their own nation.
Of course that means they’ll have to “Nationalize” (I.e. governmentally own) all their oil resources. I wonder how the oil companies and owners will cotton to that Socialism?
But if Texas is still hellbent on leaving, I say they put it to a vote for all its residents. But I also recommend as part of the ballot asking them to spell “secede”.
If they get it wrong, it counts as an extra vote to leave.
Of course, if they do vote to form their own Republic, then we would just need them to write us a check for their part of the national debt before leaving.
We’ll just wait for it to clear.
In the mean time, we can have a flag redesign contest. The easiest solution would be to go back to 48 stars (we could always make Alabama a parting gift.)
Or we could finally make Puerto Rico a state and maintain the 50 Stars.
Either way, I think the United States would be much better off without its biggest divider.