Porn Star/Artist/Sex Blogger Colby Keller and his P.I.C. (partner in
connubial bliss crime) Karl Marxxx stayed at my place this past Sunday night.
They are currently on a cross-country road trip, sight-seeing their way across the northern tier of states before ending in the pacific northwest.
Are these friends of mine? No. Well, they weren’t at the time. I didn’t really even know them until Sunday.
I do here freely admit to having a wee bit of a crush on Colby. But not for the reasons you think. Heck, I’ve never even seen his adult films!
No, I discovered Colby in a non-porn way, and sort of became fascinated with that side of him. The fully-clothed side.
Not that he isn’t handsome and built with size 15 feet and a grin that can stop traffic…..
Because I follow Colby’s blog, I happened to see their trip itinerary and noticed a Minneapolis stop on Sunday. So I wrote to them and said, “Hey, while you are in the Minne-apple, if you are seeking 5-star lodging, you should totally stay at my place!”
A simple back an forth email exchange later, and it was a done deal.
I think my place worked for them for several reasons:
(1) it was free
(2) they have their dog with them
(3) I live exactly one mile from the gay bar where Colby was making an appearance on Sunday evening
(4) it was free
You may be shaking your collective heads at me right now thinking “Why would you offer to let veritable strangers crash at your place like this?”
Well… Why the fuck not?
I had the space and the time. Plus I never really get the opportunity to entertain folks and I lead a fairly lonely life, so why not open up my place to them? It had the potential to be fun as well as a chance to share in their cross-country adventure.
And at the very least I thought I’d get a good cocktail story out of it. You know… My Night With Colby Keller or something.
Life is to short to spend it thinking “I wish I’d done that.”
Besides, I think I’m a fairly decent judge of character. Granted I only “know” Karl and Colby from the blog, twitter, and various YouTube videos, but you can still tell a lot about folks from their online presence.
If I’d have thought for a minute that Colby (or Karl) were crazy, meth addicts or nefarious characters, I never would have made the offer.
And you will be pleased to note that both of them were every bit as intelligent, gracious, goofy, and genuinely nice as I predicted.
They arrived around 8:45 on Sunday night, with their dog Neville in tow. Neville just happened to be a pit bull.
(Neville was gentile and very used to cats. Miss Phoebe did well, but kept a watchful distance).
We sat around an chatted for awhile and had a few beers. It was cool to hear about their trip, how they met, their art, schooling, etc. You know, getting to know them as real people.
Then it was time to hit the Saloon for Colby’s appearance and the “spanking booth”. Colby and Karl were concerned because they didn’t have any sort of paddle and they wanted to stop at Sex World to pick one up.
Cb to the rescue with a small leather paddle that I *ahem* just happened to have, erm, handy.
They graciously allowed me to tag along. I got in for free with them and was whisked upstairs to the “green room” area where we got to chat a bit more.
The club was slap full due to the impending Softball Gay Championships that are here in the cities this week. Colby’s spanking booth got off to a slower start, so I kept him company for awhile until “customers” started appearing.
Then I hung around outside with Karl and danced a bit and watched the amateur stripper-shower contest.
So, to recap: I’m at the Saloon on a Sunday night, drinking, surrounded by beefy softball players, watching shower strippers, dancing with Karl and listening to Colby smack various guy’s asses with my paddle.
It was all very surreal.
We left the Saloon around 1:30 am and headed back to my place. Colby and Karl were exhausted and crashed in my bedroom (with Neville), while Phoebe and I slept on my couch.
The next morning we got up, Karl and I had coffee, we took some pictures and I got them on their way about 9 am.
P.S. Colby looks adorbs with bed head, but he wouldn’t let me take a picture of it. He’s actually pretty shy and modest when it comes right down to it.
So, what with me drinking, going out on a school night, and having a porn star sleeping in my bed, Monday was an exceedingly long day at work for me.
And to answer the big question on everybody’s minds: no. No sex was had by anyone that night. Or morning.
But that was so never the point of the invitation.
This was about me being a nice guy and doing something outside my little box of existence. It was about having an adventure in my own back yard. It was about meeting two new people and hopefully making friends.
And it was about getting a damn entertaining cocktail party story.