It was “spectacle”
But no “testicles” last night.
This makes cb sad.
The big, huge ‘everyone’s-been-waiting-for-this-moment’ Glee MADONNA episode aired last night. Squeeee, right?
Hmm. More like it ‘erred’ last night.
I know, right? How DARE I badmouth Glee AND Madonna in the same breath! What am I smoking? How could I not just pass out from the sheer fabulosity of it all??
I mean, I enjoyed the episode. And I definitely thought a few things were very clever along the way. And there were a couple of songs I quite enjoyed. But much like Madonna herself, I felt the episode was all “show” and no “heart”.
Ok, so Rachel psyching herself up that she was ready to lose her virginity in the mirror after the “Like a Virgin” number was poignant- and just about the only real emotion in the whole show. And Finn’s moment was touching (after he’d finally lost his “big V”) stating how he felt nothing because it meant nothing.
But overall, the show didn’t grab me emotionally like so many of the episodes did last year.
I can hear the gay masses pouting now. “But… but cb! It was… it was… MADONNA!” *sniff*
Yeah, well I’ve never been one of those gays who shit myself over all things Madge. I like her well enough, and I can usually find one or two songs on each of her albums that I really like (except for her early shit– uggh!). And her tours are well designed and fantastically “SHOW” *insert jazz hands and spirit fingers here*
And I guess that’s what I got out of Glee last night. My favorite numbers were the Cheerios doing the whole routine with the stilts, the “Express Yourself” number with the girls with Madonna-dos, and hearing the guys sing “What it Feels Like For a Girl”.
Oh- and I must admit I squeeed myself a teensy bit on “4 minutes”. Best version of that song, hands down. Love the cheerleaders. Love the band. And I LOVE Mercedes and Kurt doing the Cheerios thang because they never get solos or any “song time” other than Mercedes being used to wail on the last note of a number.
How clever that they actually used a bitter truth in a storyline!
Things I didn’t like: the “Like a Virgin” number was cringe-inducing and saccharine (until the end of it), “Like a Prayer” was snore pie with yawn sauce (oh, look… a gospel choir and fake stained glass church scene– how original), and the “Borderline/Open Your Heart” Madge-up (see what I did there?) was merely Meh.
And the storyline as a whole really felt cobbled together. Blasting Madonna over the intercom all day at school… really?? Then they trot out the retard girl again (who is never seen unless it’s convenient), and also bring back Sue’s “retarded sister” storyline to explain her Florence Henderson locks. But there was no sympathy this time for Sue; her whole hair speech just felt disingenuous.
The whole episode just felt like it was put together by the “Lost” writers.
But what really chapped my ass was the whole reshowing of the “Vogue” video.
Actually, what chapped me more was the fact that they showed the whole video in it’s entirety last week, which completely spoiled a potentially spectacular moment this week. When you saw the video again in the context of the show, it just felt… recycled.
Way to to Glee folks. Way to turn a brilliant remake of the Vogue video into a “been there, seen that” moment.
Why the fuck didn’t they just show the first minute or so? Or a blurred-through 30 second montage of it to whet our appetites??
Big mistake. Huge.
So there you have it. The Madonna episode. So much anticipation. So much expectation. So much disappointment.
Overall it was fun and entertaining, but I’m not Bellagioing rainbow colored jizz fountains about it.