A Pussy Says What?

Wow is it HOT here in the Twin Cities!

Today it’s supposed to hit the upper 90’s. With like a bajillion percent humidity thrown in for added pleasure.

This totally reminds me of North Carolina summers… but without rednecks and black people.

The bad thing about Minnesota weather is that it never seems to ‘ease’ you into hottness or coldness.

In the fall/winter it’s like 40 for weeks on end, then suddenly it’s zero.

Or like now- it has been cool and dry for months. Barely out of the 60’s. Then WHAM! 90+ and oppressively sultry.

At least in the Carolinas you get a rampup to the insane heat and humidity so your body gets used to it.

I know I really shouldn’t be bitching. After a freaking cold winter, this weather is long overdue. And in general I really like warmer weather.

But remember… I’m a sweater. And in weather like this I’ll soak through a shirt in 10 minutes or less.

And that’s with no physical exertion, like, say… walking.

And don’t get me started on my “crotchal region”. Unless I stay ensconced in 60 degree AC, it gets moist like a snack cake down there.

We’re talking “Duncan Heinie” moist.

It’s quite disgusting really.

You should have seen me after volleyball last night. Not a dry square millimeter anywhere on me. I had even completely sweat through my kneepads!

And that was after playing indoors.

With AC.

I think I finally stopped sweating sometime around 4 am this morning. Fun!

To top it all off, this is PRIDE week here. And here’s little ol’ me suffering from swamp-ass and clammy-crotch.

Just perfect.

What cute gay guy is gonna want to talk to someone who is sweating more than his ice cold beer bottle?

Jesus hates me.

And because it’s Minnesota, revenge is best served as a hot dish.

About cb

Nickname: Munt Measurements: 45 B, 34, 38(?) Ambition: to be the best human ever! Turn ons: long walks on the beach, romantic dinners, porn, rainbows, cock Turn offs: bad smell face, men who are full of themselves, dead puppies, popcorn, sadness
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

14 Responses to A Pussy Says What?

  1. spamwise says:

    It might be hot in Minnesota, I wouldn’t know. šŸ˜‰

    It’s been monsoon season here in Hobbiton for the past month now. If it rains on Pride, I’ll be one very pissed off hobbit.

  2. yeah, but that hot dish is a good one šŸ˜‰ … I’d be surprised if it doesn’t get bitten into at least once this weekend…

  3. This isn’t volleyball season… it’s lay by the pool with a Mojito season.

  4. Ben says:

    Yes, Jesus hates me too… It’s 8 degrees here and I’m still sweating far too much from the walk from the train to work.

    At pride, just walk around with a towle asking cute gentlemen if they would like to “towel you down”

  5. A Lewis says:

    Hahahaha….you said WHAM. They were gay…right?? What a group. Do you need someone to gently rub ice cubes on your back and up and down your legs? That’ll cool you down.

  6. The Mutant says:

    Aw, qwitcherbitchin would ya. I’m a sweater too – it’s fucking freezing in Melbourne and I’m still a damp little unit, but I find it makes sexual fun and games a whole lot more entertaining when your partner can’t get a decent grip.

    Well… I enjoy it at least.

  7. Jim says:

    LOL! You’re great! I love how you describe everything so perfectly!

  8. javabear says:

    Weather there sounds a lot like it is here. I hate this weather. I, too, sweat like a race horse. I’m inside, barely dressed, with the A/C turned down low, and a fan set up in front of the cold air vent in my room. I’ll stay here until late September if I can swing it.

    But isn’t this just a temporary heat wave in Minnesota? Won’t it get a little bit cooler and less humid in a few days? We’ll have this stinking weather, and hotter, non-stop ’til mid-September at the earliest. Of course you know that, having lived in NC.

  9. truthspew says:

    Been rainy and low to mid 60’s in Providence for the past couple weeks but it’s going to start popping up into the high 80’s Thursday. I love it.

    Love it, love it, love it. Sure I sweat a bit but hey, lots of eye candy around.

  10. penny says:

    Sorry, babe! It’s hotter in North Carolina, hotter than Satan’s taint! This weekend it will be 95-100 and you remember the humidity. I’ll be in the pool or in the AC. I sweat real bad for a skinny girl!

  11. Ray Ray says:

    If I’m not mistaken, swamp-ass and clammy crotch are a big plus in the circles you run in! :p

  12. Blobby says:

    Then WHAM! 90+ and oppressively sultry.

    That must have been when Andrew Ridgely walked in the room!

  13. Mark in DE says:

    I do sympathize with you, being a sweater and all. Spouse is too, and always hates looking “toe up” at outdoor functions. But as you said, jesus hates you.

    Great writing, by the way.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s