Fetish for the Brown stuff

I have sort of a kinky fetish which I feel I must admit.  After all, admitting you have a problem is the first step to recovery, right?  Although in this case, I’m not so sure I wanna be cured.

I love the look.  The texture and color.  The anticipation of a big ‘prezzie’.  God, even the smell!  I’m even feeling a bit ‘flushed’ just thinking about it!  And the sight of those big, beefy, hairy legs all spread while they start sqatting down makes me lose my shit.

My fetish?  UPS.

 

UPS turns my crank.  When I see the brown trucks driving with their see-through tops and open side doors, I get a chubby.  I nearly get in accidents trying to look at the drivers– all sexy in their brown shorts and beefy calves.  When I see a UPS truck stopped in my neighborhood (or at work) I immediately fantasize about following the driver into the back and unwrapping some packages of our own.

And like they don’t know their uniforms are sexy and fever-inducing.  Hell, they even sexualize their own stretching diagrams.  You tell ME they didn’t know what they were doing when they sketched this Dutch Daddy demonstrating proper rimming technique!

 

 What can Brown do for me??  I want to get tied up and gagged with packing tape.  Use the damn sticky labels on my nipples.  I want to be raped with the damn rollup door wide open.  I want him to make me use my cock to sign my name on the digital receipt clipboard.  I want to blow a driver while cruising through a school zone with the cab doors open.

As you can see, I’m down with the Brown.

I also fantasize about stealing a truck sometime.

I want to drive one so badly, and they make it so tempting by having the cab doors open and the radio playing while they are making deliveries.  You know it would be a blast to jump in one, crank it up, feel that diesel engine throb while you shoved it in gear and took off down the street.  And how hot would it be to look in the side rearview mirror and see the UPS guy yelling and sprinting after his stolen vehicle like some brown short-wearing T-Rex!

Make that a T “Sex”.

Is my fetish for the brown stuff so wrong??  Do these impure thoughts make me a bad person?